Why share the painful chapters?
November 15, 2017

Many years ago I worked with a guy I adored. He was smart and funny and fun, and no one -- not even Darrell or Katie -- has laughed harder at my stories.

He and his family became friends to Darrell and Kate and me, and one day while we were waiting for their delicious homemade vegetarian pizza to finish warming in their oven, he told me about someone in his extended family whose very name could make him sick. Seriously. He told us just hearing the name of the state that person was from -- let’s call it Michigan -- could trigger the same reaction.

I was Team This Guy, obviously. I held him in such esteem I was sure the other person was the problem. Which is…beside the point. The point is what changed as I listened to his revelation.

There are people -- not in my immediate orbit, thankfully -- who inspire the same reaction in me. I never crave time with them, not even for the practice of transcending that nails-on-a-chalkboard feeling. But until my friend -- my super-successful-seeming friend with the sweetest immediate family and a professional way about him I will always miss -- owned up to this messy part of his life, I’d always thought my aversion to some people was a character flaw.

Not anymore!