How do you keep score?
October 19, 2016
Someone we used to work with described my blog as a collection of “thought starters,” and that’s one reason I still write with him in mind sometimes. When he told me he’d printed out a post to show his wife -- one of my favorites, about making peace with time -- well, you can imagine my delight. I live for things like that.
A woman wrote to me a while back and said that after hearing an interview I did with a casting director, she was going to get behind her daughter’s dream of becoming an actress. The two had been at odds, definitely. Not anymore.
Someone who talked to me at length about my diet wrote to me recently to say she’d tried it -- and is devoted to it. She’s lost more than thirty pounds, but that isn’t even the best part. The best part is how she feels.
The conductor Benjamin Zander says his job is to awaken possibility in other people. If their eyes are shining, he’s doing it.
I’ve had way more than my share of shining eyes in my orbit. Every day’s another attempt to be worthy of those.
Do you keep score?
October 18, 2016
Several years ago a friend wanted to know how much money I made on a project. It struck me as odd. We were having a conversation about less measurable things. How much we loved getting up in the morning, the difference we wanted to make in the world -- those kinds of things.
It’s natural to wonder how much people earn. I do it. But there’s a time and a place and a tone. This felt like someone had crashed our party of two with a scorecard: “Let’s see the numbers! Show us those bank statements!”
It was jarring. It felt like going from a darkened movie theater into a blindingly sunny summer afternoon. “Oh. That’s right. The world’s still going on out here.”
I lose myself in conversations, granted. And when you reduce me to a spreadsheet, you lose me.
Maybe you’ve heard it said that the only people who supposedly don’t care how many followers they have online are the same people who don’t have that many. Which might be true. But you can’t tell me the people who fly mostly under the radar don’t matter. They do.
Just ask the people who couldn’t live without them. They matter.
Do you waste time making decisions?
October 17, 2016
For all the ways I’ve waxed smug on the blog about laundry as meditation, I still don’t look forward to it. It’s laundry. You know what makes it easier? Having decided when I’ll do it, and sticking to that.
You might think it’s trivial, but that’s because it isn’t in context. In the context of dozens of other things that come around all the time, that keep the trains running, it helps to give them their own special places on the schedule.
“A place for everything, and everything in its place.” Is that why Darrell and I spend so little time, relative to the average, looking for things?
The same is true for chores. There’s a time and a place. When we’re “home” -- wherever we call it at the moment -- you’ll probably find me doing laundry on the same day of the week. No sense wasting brain cells making the same decision over and over. Not only that, but I’ve also been finding places on the schedule for things more important than laundry -- like sharing more of my work. Pitching. Reaching. I’m starting to think of myself as someone who does what she’s supposed to do when she’s supposed to do it. It’s momentum.
You start small, with a laundry basket, and soon you’re on your way to becoming the owner of a chain of drycleaners -- or whatever your little entrepreneurial heart desires.
Trivial? I don’t think so! Momentum is magic.
How do you stay in shape?
October 16, 2016
“I think it’s great how much you and your husband love to run,” someone told me a few years ago. I looked over my shoulder to see the person she was talking with. “Who, me?” I finally asked. “We don’t love to run,” I told her. “But you do it almost every day,” she said.
The secret to life.
We don’t run very fast -- well, except for thirty-second surges every two minutes -- or very far. But we’re devoted. Rain, snow, sleet, or hail? We could give the postal service a run for its money!
You might be surprised by how little effort it takes to stay in shape. You don’t have to be a maniac about it.
But consistent? That helps!
Are you afraid of hard work?
October 14, 2016
I don’t know if I remember this correctly, but it seems to me a little sister once took it to my parents about not getting her started in some sport -- ice skating, I think -- as a toddler. She couldn’t have been much older than that at the time. As to why it mattered: “How am I supposed to make it to the Olympics?”
She had a point. World-class in anything usually means a lifetime of dedication and practice.
Until I talked with Charlie Hamblin, I wasn’t sure it was worth it. Charlie’s a roller skater on the US World Team, and I wondered if he missed out on a real childhood. “Not at all,” he says. “It was difficult and it was worth it.”
Charlie’s learned a lot on the rink. He’s learned to work hard, to be patient, to persist. The most important thing he’s learned is that hard work and great fun are not mutually exclusive: “It’s work and play at once.” Charlie didn’t have as much free time as other kids -- still doesn’t -- but he had some. And he lived to be on the rink. Still does.
Charlie says you can tell which kids have been brought up with a good work ethic or have learned it through sports: “They manage themselves well and they get things done.”
Hard work. A fun life. Don’t let anyone tell you it has to be one or the other!
What are you up to?
October 13, 2016
Once upon a time I took a freelance writing class from a teacher who was on his way to making a living as a writer. Good move! You can learn a lot about writing from someone who’s doing that successfully.
Vince was fond of asking, “Is there a story here?” Good question! You can learn a lot about your life from having the courage to ask yourself that.
Is there a story here? If not, what the heck are you doing with this little wisp of time on the planet?
No, it isn’t too late.
But it’s late!
How strong is your imagination?
October 12, 2016
A good friend once told me most people go after half their visions with half their hearts, which is why they fail before they start.
What if you were just starting out and could do anything you wanted with your life? What if you had a chance to do something that made your heart sing? Would you take it?
Please say yes. And send postcards!
Do you get enough sleep?
October 11, 2016
Hey. How’s it going? Did you get enough sleep last night? If you didn’t, may I make a suggestion? Go a little easier on yourself today if you can. Maybe ask people to stick to the easy questions until you get more coffee -- or a nap.
Needing sleep to function isn’t a character flaw. And if you drive while you’re drowsy you may as well be drinking or texting.
Some things are life or death.